” The desire for more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And, paradoxically, the acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself a positive experience.”
Mark explains the above concept beautifully in his first chapter titled Don’t Try. If the title sounded so negative or wonky to you (as it did to me), welcome to the 224 pages of wonkiness! This book will ensure you will feel this way from start to end. You will find content pieces like ‘Happiness Is a Problem’, ‘Choose your struggle‘, ‘You are Not Special‘, ‘You are Wrong about Everything‘, ‘Kill Yourself‘ etc. neatly explained. All of which are exactly the reverse of what i used to believe.
So i bought the book.
I used to think happiness is everything and is attained by attracting and by being always in a state of positivity. After reading this book, i realised throughout my life i’ve been ‘indoctrinated’ with the belief that we should try to be as inherently accepting and affirmative as possible. We were never taught to accept rejection. This is the cornerstone of many of the so-called positive thinking books. They never talk about the repercussions of denying negative emotions. To deny negativity is to perpetuate problems rather than solving them. So, I’m now open to accepting negativity, learning from it and treading carefully. The book also talks about how Rejection makes your life better in the chapter The Importance of Saying No.
May be I’ve never tried such counterintuitive (adj: contrary to intuition or to common-sense expectation) approaches to living a good life before which is probably why i felt the titles uncomfortable and wonky. Mark explains not giving a f*ck does not mean being indifferent, it means being comfortable with being different.
“This book hits you like a much-needed slap in the face from your best friend: hilarious, vulgar, and immensely thought-provoking. Only read if you’re willing to set aside all excuses and take an active role in living a f***ing better life.” (Steve Kamb, bestselling author of Level Up Your Life and founder of NerdFitness.com)
I’m keeping this book and will re-read it when i seek counter-intuitiveness in life.
If you like what you read, you can support by buying this book directly from Amazon: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck (affiliate link)